Snow – 2, Mary – 0

Snow – 2, Mary – 0

I hate hiking in the snow.  Actually, maybe despise would be a better term. Or wait, maybe detest… Anyway..You will not BELIEVE what happened to me this weekend! First though, let me give you a little background on why I stupidly thought it would be a good idea to brave snow-hiking again. Justin goes hiking every weekend, rain – sun – or snow. Stupid, stupid snow. He always comes back with these crazy stories of hiking 6 miles through 3 feet of snow, just for that perfect shot. His stories are so elaborate and he tells them with such enthusiasm that he had me convinced that there is nothing better than slapping on 5 layers of clothing and heading out into feet and feet of snow for miles. So, after weeks of hearing  his snow ridden hiking adventures, I thought I would give it a shot, that maybe, just maybe, I would have the time of my life. I mean, I love extreme snow tubing, and igloo building, right? Oohh…  I was wrong… so, so very wrong.

Justin and I took a trip up to Vermont to visit some close friends this past weekend. We ended up being able to get our hands on some snowshoes for about a half an hour. (I’m seriously shaking my head as I sit here writing this.) We start heading towards the trail, when Justin dunks one of his snow shoes into what must have been a brook under all the snow. We started making our way around it, or so we thought… until I tried to go up this 4 foot snow mound to bypass the brook. I put my left foot down into the snow… and it kept going and going and going… until it hits water. Lots of it. At this point, my left leg is in water up to my ankle, and I’m stuck in snow up to my hip. Justin is behind me, rolling his eyes and laughing… telling me to just pull my leg up hard. No can do… because as my foot went down, the snow caved in… so I’m stuck. Like so stuck that I had to pull my foot out of my boot to get out. Are you laughing yet? Because it gets better. You try walking in the snow with one snowshoe, and one foot only covered with a sock. You can’t. I had to take the other snowshoe off… and my shoe, because my fingers were so cold I couldn’t work the bindings.   So I ended up IN the snow mound, up to my hips… with BOTH of my feet ONLY in socks,  in the 6 inches of water underneath the snow. Cold, freezing, icy water.  Sigh. Did I mention I HATE hiking in the snow? I ended up crawling (more like squirming)  my way over the snow mound and to the parking lot because every time I attempted to take another step, I kept sinking farther and farther into the water. Not to mention, Justin was NO help, because he was mad he had to dig my snowshoe and boot out of 4 feet of wet, mushy snow. Our friends thought it was pretty hysterical though.

Can you believe there’s more? Later on that day I wanted to check out my favorite swimming spot in VT, this awesome old slate quarry that’s collected water over the years. It’s a really gorgeous place, and looked even prettier frozen over, with ice hanging off the cliffs.  It isn’t a very long hike… but once again, I’m 5’3″ and there’s about 2.5 feet of snow on the ground in Vermont still. Somehow, I thought this would be a great idea. I mean, I FINALLY get to experience all the fun and excitement Justin has hiking in the snow… Yeah. Okay. We get 3/4 of the way there, and have to find another way to the path because the main path is way too steep to tackle with all the snow on it. I’m talking need to scramble up and down the trail on hands and knees steep. So we turn around, find a less steep way down… and slowly make our way over to the quarry. Anyway, this story ends AGAIN with me soaked up to my hips, and Justin having to bail me out. This time, Justin made a one foot wide path for me by crunching down all the snow so I could make my way out. (Yes, I got stuck again) Needless to say… I’ll be staying off the trails until all the snow melts. And there’s nothing… and I mean NOTHING that anyone can say or do to convince me otherwise. I hate hiking in the snow.